Marlene Halim

“RM describes the afterlife for the individuals who make it out after a prison sentence. The stark reality is that life after incarceration is its own kind of prison. The book captures a system so bereft that it continues its damaging work far beyond the prison’s walls, taking in a fell swoop the formerly incarcerated as well as their loved ones. RM refers to jails and cells as “cages” with the legal exclusion inside a prison building and outside – as the title spells out: Halfway Home. Halfway houses that feel like other cages with rules and restrictions of their own. Housing policies that create yet another form of family separation. In a country that has incarcerated at a pace that is unmatched the world over RM shines a light on the harsh reality that the formerly incarcerated are never truly free, that they still have an X on their back for the rest of their existence. Jobs that elude them, apartments that are off-limits, voting rights that are taken away, the ability to move freely” (excerpt of review of book, “Halfway Home”) This review of the book, “Halfway Home”, was written well in that it was very descriptive, painting pictures in the reader’s mind. The assigned editing task is to shorten the review because it was seven paragraphs in length, much too long. These are my suggestions as to how to make one paragraph more succinct and powerful. You will see that an incomplete sentence has been corrected as well. “RM compares the afterlife of formerly incarcerated individuals as its own kind of prison. Capturing a view of the derelict system inside, he exposes the damage which goes beyond the prison walls to fell not only the formerly imprisoned but his loved ones along with him. “Halfway Home” reveals the shortfall of the prison system and the halfway houses which place restrictions that prevent healing. Under present conditions, the formerly incarcerated are never truly free, as if they wore an X on their back, forever identifying them with their past. Jobs elude them, apartments are off-limits, voting rights have been taken away, as well as their ability to move freely.”