Nicole Bornales

MY ADVENTURE OF CHASING DOWN A DREAM, ONE STEP AT A TIME; An intellectual autobiography I am Cole B., a third year college student of Ateneo De Naga University, taking up Bachelor of Science in Tourism Management. I see myself as an embodiment of a new meaning of life, whose purpose on earth is to find the true calling of life and fulfill it. I believe taking education is the platform and biggest step towards reaching my goal for a destiny which I will decide. “Good Morning miss!”, “Good Morning Ma’am!” “Good Morning Madam!” –These are the phrases that I dreamed to hear as I walked down a hallway of a big building when I was five. I felt like having a stick would grant me the power to control many kids the same age as me. I dreamed of becoming a woman of knowledge whose sympathy is for her students. I see myself as someone whom they can rely on when they have problems in understanding English, reading long stories and counting in math. At the age of five, my principles in life are not that deep and constructed. The way I look at things are merely based on a low level of understanding and mostly interpreted based on what I see from the television, particularly in Disney movies and cartoon channels. My mom would even buy me different colors of chalkboard and a mini-board where I can practice writing and solving numbers. Since I was a single child, they let me invite friends in the house to play. I remember a time when we play “teacher-teacheran” with my couple of friends, I pretend i am the teacher and gave them something to do, “Missions” as a describe them before. One of my playmates got angry because she wanted to be the teacher but I opposed. I told her that since I am the owner of the stick, I should be the one to teach. Everyone agreed and we continued to play. All of my friends were happy playing except her. Assuming I have the spirit of a teacher at the age of five, I told them that whoever will choose to go against my will must be given a punishment –just like exactly what I see in the television; teachers scolding their students for disobeying. By that time, I Jokingly scolded my friend since she’s not contributing anything to the play. I pointed the stick straight to her and told her to face on the corner of a wall in a certain period of time. She got mad, and snatched the stick out of my hand and hit me, then I cried. It is a funny thing to say that by the time I was hit by a stick on the head, I realized that there is a danger in becoming a teacher. And that exists when they are confronted with hard headed students and have miscommunications and misunderstanding. That moment changed my interest from becoming a teacher to being a soldier. I can clearly say that I had a drastic transition of becoming who i want to be while growing up. Individuals who are brave and courageous enough to fight for their beloved father land –that’s how I describe soldiers when I was eight years of age. I am fascinated by how they are depicted in the media before. I see them in newspapers, magazines and mostly in television. I am amazed by how they are looked up to by society. At the age of eight, I am fully aware that soldiers undergo difficult training and serious tests before they become eligible in their profession. My dream of becoming a soldier didn’t last long. My father is fond of watching movies and most of the time what he watches are action movies. That saved me from dreaming about something that will put me in a grave. Through action movies, I was enlightened about how risky my dream was. I keep telling myself that if i choose to become a soldier there will be no assurance that my hardships will payoff. It is because I knew that once I join the military, even if I train hard and pass all the tests, once I am sent to fight in a war, I will panic and die. So you see, it will not be practical for me to invest my parent’s money and effort on education, if at the end I knew that there is a big probability that I will be taken down by a single metal-bullet. As I grew up and became aware of what is happening around me, I discovered that my mom is sick and she was diagnosed with systemic autoimmune disease or Lupus as Doctors call it. It is the scariest moment of my life because I thought I would lose a mother. I am afraid that the disease will take my mom away from me. That thought pushed me to dream of becoming a Doctor. I remember how my mom changed moods when she was experiencing pain during those times. I also experienced being left by my parents in a relative’s house because they can’t bring me on other days of dialysis. Looking back, I think that was the hardest challenge that my family experienced. It is also the time that at a very young age I made a promise to myself to finish my studies and become a doctor so that I can cure the love of my life which is my mom. Although I had the idea of being a doctor, there were moments in my life where I deviated from that idea. When I was in grade school I was always chosen as a candidate for mathematical contests during private school day. That gave me an idea of becoming a mathematician. That dream was short lived when I realized that I actually wasn't good at math. The only reason I solved things and equations is because they haven’t yet mixed with letters and a lot of symbols. I discovered it in my first year of high school when I started having troubles in counting numbers while figuring so many things just to find the X and Y’s. It happened that when I turned High school, my interests and hobbies didn’t reflect the way I planned to become. It is the time of my life wherein as I faced the teenage years, I discovered that I like to become a fashion designer because of my love in sketching and designing. I use these advantages to become a member of the school’s journalism. I was accounted as the organization’s cartoonist, lay-out artist and also one of its literary writers. Which gave me an opportunity to compete and learn outside the school. My journey of being a junior high school student didn’t end up in the four corners of the journalism department, it enhanced my skills and abilities, especially my confidence as an individual to make a stand in front of a crowd and deeply express myself. That unlocked my other passion in life. I started joining pageants inside and outside of school and bagging titles and crowns. Not all days favors me. There are times when my expectations and plans don't line up with reality. My biggest downfall in my career is when I was obviously cheated by my competitors during a big pageant. This is the time when my philosophical value that I hold in life was measured. I finished the night with a smile on my face knowing that I will go home fair and have inner peace in self. I was able to hold on my value of staying morally upright despite the prevalence of immoral acts. I went home with the acceptance of the loss. Respecting the outcome of the pageant has rewarded me with good karma. After what happened I gained so much attention and respect from people and became a friend to everyone. I didn’t just become presentable to the eyes of my friends and family but also to God. Little did I know that God has a better plan for me. He didn’t permit me to take home the crown of Ms. Sipocot for the reason that it's his plan to make me the Ms. El verde Of Camarines Sur which granted me full tuition scholarship throughout my college years. There Are times I am proud of myself and also there are days that I feel like I'm disappointed. When I'm proud, I treat myself, I celebrate. But when I feel disappointed, I uplift myself. I think of ways and motivations that will inspire me to pursue harder to achieve what I set out to do, my goals and dreams. I continue improving myself so that one day I can be an inspiration to some, and become an epitome of a person who perfects herself by welcoming all opportunities and challenges that come her way. As I continue to live with my awakened passions, making my realty dreams a reality has led my feet to enroll in a prestigious University of Ateneo De Naga. It has broadened my horizons, to the point that it feels like I bloom like a flower. I enrolled in the course of Tourism because I can see that this does not only reflect my passion but also this has an endless amount of opportunities for me. Tourism industry is not only about walking in an aisle of an aircraft, wearing a fancy uniform, while sporting a million dollar smile to passengers and flashing exceptional postures and manners to people of the world– one thing I discovered as I venture the world being a student majoring in tourism. When I was a child I used to see the tourism industry like that, but as I grow older and become more knowledgeable about things through the help of education, I am being awakened from this ignorance. Five years from now, I see myself as a woman of refined behavior and speech. I am polite, pleasant, classy and my manner has courtesy and care. I envision myself as someone who is ready enough to use her voice to a greater good and be able to extend hand for the purpose that she can serve and be able to contribute even a little in the society. I see someone who is fulfilled in the endeavors in life and willing to love and be loved. I believe that we individuals are destined to have our own battles in becoming who we are. Many of us come to a time in our life where we start questioning ourselves about things such “Who am really I?”, “What am I doing here?”, “What am I created for?” and so on. And when it happens sometimes we become in an endless cycle of questioning everything, One after another. In this fast changing world as we individuals are in the search of our purpose, we spend our lives dissatisfied, proving things and most especially proving ourselves to others around us. Many of us become confused and mistaken on recognizing what does really matter and what does not. And there will come a point wherein we will find ourselves in a path that is unfamiliar yet we refuse of not taking it. There will be a constant trying for everything that can do, wherein we may succeed and the others may not. Of course, I understand that life is not just a bed of roses, and challenges and hardships are an integral element of life. In conclusion, it is worth noting that my intellectual path has been a long and bumpy one. It started when I was young and is still going on. I have faced the challenges that have helped shape my destiny. I have also experienced some barriers that I have had to overcome in order to be who I am. One thing I know for certain is that the journey is not yet finished since no one stops learning until they are in the grave. Therefore, I still have a long journey ahead of me. The only difference is that I am more knowledgeable than I was in the past. Name of Alma Mater in Grade school: Nazareth Institute of learning and formation Junior High school: Sipocot National High School Senior High school: Sipocot National High School