Oluwanifise Olamuyiwa

Memories The ache of a time long gone, Cacophony of pleasurable sound waves, Nostalgic stories, my history, The world of forgotten lakes, Filled with streams of life, Echoes of love, rocks of pain, Drops of water, or sweat, Music like rain, falling slowly, Ever surely rhythmic with every passing moment, They call to me, help me stay on track, Or cling to sanity, create reason for the unreasonable, Hope in the hopeless, clarity when I'm lost and feel stranded, Teach me purpose, the value of friendship, How importantly strict relationships should be, The boundaries you need, the people you leave behind, On your path to finding you again, From when the world around choked it out of you, Made you feel you lost your mind, Well you were, losing it slowly, As you succumbed to their lies, Taught you how to hate, how to disregard your happiness, Forced you to say, terrible things you never believed about yourself, Locked you away, from good thoughts, Of peace, not loneliness, Each one waiting to shock you with a new discovery, Like how you didn't realize you were a gullible child, How clueless you were, how much it hurt when you found out, The times you spent, holding on to imaginary things, That you created to shield you from the truth, To hide your fears, to cope through... Maybe you'll find them again, If you stopped fighting to forget, One day you might heal, be free once more, Like that little child who only wanted a doll, You could just let go of the pain, Ease into the ache, not shun it away, Taking pills to drown it out, keep up the facade, The internet is full of them, Little kids typing away, They're all grown up, yet still as clueless, We all are, just depends on how hard you pretend not to be, The awareness that we know nothing, that what we do know could not be true at all, The insecurities, like how long do we really have to make a difference, And what kind of feat should we accomplish, How did the greatest in history solve this, Was it some divine message or were they just ballsy, There's no way to tell, Unless you count the deity who no one ever seems to figure out, Because we're all trying to be god in our lives, And releasing control, even if that control isn't real, Is traumatizing, scary beyond our wildest nightmares, So we cling to mirages, Or whatever keeps us sane for the next minute, Don't worry about tomorrow, It will come if it will, Yesterday's too late to come back, Today is too fresh to ruin, Stop trying so hard to not make mistakes, If it were that easy, we'd all be perfect, Maybe someday, but not this second, You still have another to try again, Life feels better when you close your eyes, You're grateful for the darkness, it's ironic but it's true, Feels safer than the light, The one that reminds you, you don't think you're fit, Worthy of your responsibilities, That though you work so hard, You have no idea what you're really doing, You're winging it and learning fast, some slower, some indifferent, We'll find Nirvana, but not today, Heaven might just be a mile away, But there's no telling when we have to knock on its gates, So why live like a prisoner of the past, We'll never get it back, Never see those times again, Deja vu is reminding you to move on, Telling you there's so much more, You haven't seen, touched, felt, tasted, Have you eaten delicacies from the Caribbean, Of in the hot sands of the deserts, The grassy fields of the savanna, Soaked in the swamps of the wetlands, Ridden on winds with eagles and falcons, Slept in trees surrounded by komodo dragons, It takes one step, Focus on today, tomorrow might just come again.