Copyedit of Fiction Manuscript
Original Text
gifted with warm, rich skin, green eyes, and dark hair with wonderful auburn highlights.
The family owned their own home with the smallest of yards, but it was theirs and it was
really all they needed. Ian’s parents never had any aspirations to be rich or famous; they
wanted a simple, happy life. And for a little while, they’d had everything they’d dreamed
of.
Charlie’s father had never been in the picture, bailing shortly after finding out about the
pregnancy. His mother, however, was as doting and protective as they came. She worked
tirelessly while they were kids to put herself through nursing school. Being a single
parent in any era was tough, but being a single black mother in the 1970s was nearly
impossible. The ridiculous prejudice that ran rampant made it trying for the family, but
Angelica had handled it with incomparable grace and class. While they might have lived
in low-income housing, their apartment was always spotless and ready to entertain guests.
Their furniture and clothing might not have been new, but they were always clean and
held themselves with more dignity and pride than many of the “rich” folks in town.
When they were eleven, Charlie and his mother had finally been able to move into their
own apartment; coincidentally right down the street from Ian’s house. It was a small,
two-family house, but it was theirs and they had been thrilled. Six months later, just after
Charlie had turned twelve, Angelica was killed. Chuck had been spending the weekend at
Ian’s, as he often did when his mother worked the overnight rotation at the hospital, when
the police had showed up at the door. Angelica had been hit by a truck when a sleeping
motorist jumped the curb as she walked home from work, killing her instantly. Charlie
had come to live with Ian and his family permanently after that. To this day, they’d still
never heard from Charlie’s father; both doubted they ever would.
After all the tragedy and heartache they’d suffered as kids, neither one ever dreamed their
situations could turn around so completely, or that they’d reach such wealth in their
lifetimes.
Charlie Daniels, always a computer whiz, had developed a new gaming system that
outsold any system prior at the age of twenty-one. The graphics on cdONE were amazing,
and it sold out several dozen times in the first six months. No other gaming system had
ever flown off the shelves at such a rate. cdONE did just about everything; acting as a
modem, a game, and music player. It also had wireless technology to act as a speaker for
incoming calls, as well as the capability to perform as a home security and convenience
center – that thing could control the lights, heat, a/c, and damn near everything else.
The best thing about cdONE in Ian’s opinion, however, was that it had the capability of
adapting. As a new form of entertainment media came available, Charlie’s system could
easily be upgraded to play it. No more replacing all your movies, music and games.
cdONE would not only play all previous versions, but would be adaptable to all new
forms. It was truly a brilliant design. One of Charlie’s biggest concerns regarding the
system was that the cost of any upgrades stays reasonable. He’d wanted to get rich, but
not by robbing hard working folks to get there. Ian couldn’t be more proud of his best
friend.
Even charging far below what the system was worth, Charlie went from making barely
twenty thousand per year, to a millionaire overnight. Now his wealth neared the billion-
Original Text
dollar range. Thankfully, he remained the same guy Ian had known since before puberty.
Though, this new side to his age-old friend was both alluring and alarming for Ian. Ian
wondered if he’d have ever met Shannon if Charlie had been able to talk him into his
lifestyle when he’d first tried. Would he have always found it so exciting? Or was it his
age and stability in life that made something taboo so appealing? Ian wasn’t sure, though
he did worry greatly about containing his new desires.
Ian McCullough had graduated high school a year early and went on to his pre-med
schooling at the age of sixteen. After doing his two years of pre-med at Penn State, Ian
graduated from Jefferson Medical College with his MD in a total of six years. While
doing his residency in the oncology surgical unit, Ian had developed a new kind of
procedure to fight cancer. With his ideas and Charlie’s computer expertise, Ian created a
program and the accompanying mechanics to perform far less invasive surgeries on the
children he saw suffering.
Having lost his baby sister to a brain tumor when she was only two years old, Ian had
always planned to be a doctor specializing in the treatment of cancer. Sadly, however,
even with all his company’s research they were no closer to finding a cure. But Ian was
sure that it was only a matter of time. Perhaps they couldn’t cure all cancer, but even just
ridding the world of one form that robbed lives would be amazing.
And while patenting and selling his software and surgical equipment had made Ian
wealthy, it was the development of a new drug along with his wife that truly made him
rich. Together they’d developed a more stable form of chemotherapy that was more lethal
to the cancer cells with very limited toxicity to healthy tissue. The trick was all in the
delivery system at the molecular level.
One of the most frustrating things about cancer treatment was the side effects the patients
suffered. Whether it was the nausea and hair loss, or the conditions that developed years
later, the treatment was often harder on the patient than the disease itself. The meds were
necessary in order to survive, but highly unpleasant to go through. And for pediatrics,
most of those treatments resulted in sterility for the patient as well. These were the issues
than Ian’s new treatment sought to combat. Treat the cancer without killing the patient.
Ian had refused to sell his drug to any pharmaceutical company that intended to gouge
those who would depend on the medicine. Granted, Ian could have made far more money
being greedy, but he’d have lost the ability to live with himself in the process. One of the
reasons Maureen had died was his family’s lack of funds to pay for her treatment.
Maureen’s death had been the catalyst that had ultimately driven Ian’s mother to commit
suicide. Cancer didn’t just destroy the patient, it destroyed the families as well.
Ian never wanted another child to lose its life over money, especially if he had the power
to prevent it.
The men sat for several hours laughing, drinking, and talking as they munched on
appetizer platters. While Ian was nowhere near drunk, he wasn’t sure driving home was a
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Final Text
gifted with warm, rich skin, green eyes, and dark hair with wonderful auburn highlights;
she would have been a stunning young woman. The family owned their own home with
the smallest of yards, but it was theirs and it was really all they needed. Ian’s parents
never had any aspirations to be rich or famous; they wanted a simple, happy life. And for
a little while, they had everything they’d ever dreamed of. Or at least they had, until his
sister died at two and his mother’s resulting depression stole her away from Ian at the age
of fourteen.
Charlie knew very little about his father other than he was a tall, thin, blonde man that
took off shortly after finding out Angelica was pregnant. His mother didn’t like to talk
about the man, but was as doting and protective as they come. While they were kids she
worked tirelessly to put herself through nursing school. Being a single parent in any era
was tough, but being a single, black mother in the 1970s was nearly impossible. The
ridiculous prejudice that ran rampant made it trying for the family, but Angelica had
handled it with incomparable grace and class. While they might have lived in low-income
housing, their apartment was always spotless and ready to entertain guests. Their
furniture and clothing might not have been new, but they were always clean and held
themselves with more dignity and pride than many of the “rich” folks in town.
When the boys were eleven, Charlie and his mother were finally able to move into their
own apartment; coincidentally right down the street from Ian’s house. It was a small,
slightly run-down house with only two units, but it was theirs and they had been thrilled.
Six months later, just after Charlie turned twelve, Angelica was killed. The police showed
up at the door while Chuck had been spending the weekend at Ian’s, as he often did when
his mother worked the overnight rotation at the hospital. Angelica had been killed
instantly when a sleeping motorist jumped the curb in his truck as she was walking home.
Charlie came to live with Ian and his family permanently after that. To this day, they’d
still never heard from Charlie’s father; both doubted they ever would.
After all the tragedy and heartache they suffered as kids, neither one ever dreamed their
situations could turn around so completely, or that they’d reach such wealth in their
lifetimes.
Charlie Daniels, always a computer whiz, developed a new gaming system at the age of
twenty-one that outsold any prior system. The graphics on cdONE were amazing, and it
sold out several dozen times in the first six months. No other gaming system had ever
flown off the shelves at such a rate. cdONE did just about everything, acting as a modem,
a game, and music player. It also had wireless technology to act as a speaker for
incoming calls, as well as the capability to perform as a home security and convenience
center – that thing could control the lights, heat, A/C, and damn near everything else.
The best thing about cdONE, in Ian’s opinion however, was that it had the capability of
adapting. As a new form of entertainment media became available, Charlie’s system
could easily be upgraded to play it. No more replacing all your movies, music and games.
cdONE would not only play all previous versions, but would be adaptable to all new
forms. It was truly a brilliant design. One of Charlie’s biggest concerns regarding the
system was that the cost of any upgrades should stay reasonable. He’d wanted to get rich,
but not by robbing hard working folks to get there. Ian couldn’t be more proud of his best
friend.
Final Text
Even charging far below what the system was worth, Charlie went from making barely
twenty thousand per year, to a millionaire overnight. Now his wealth neared the billiondollar range. Thankfully, he remained the same guy Ian had known since before puberty.
Though, this new side to his age-old friend was both alluring and alarming for him. Ian
wondered if he would have ever met Shannon if Charlie had been able to talk him into his
lifestyle when he first tried. Would he have always found it so exciting? Or was it his age
and stability in life that made something taboo so appealing? Ian wasn’t sure, though he
was starting to worry greatly about containing his new desires.
Ian McCullough graduated high school a year early and went on to his pre-med schooling
at the age of sixteen. After doing two years of pre-med at Penn State, Ian graduated from
Jefferson Medical College with his MD in a total of six years. While doing his residency
in the oncology surgical unit, Ian developed a new kind of procedure to fight cancer.
With his ideas and Charlie’s computer expertise, Ian created a program and the
accompanying mechanics to perform far less invasive surgeries on the children he saw
suffering.
Having lost his baby sister to a brain tumor when she was only two years old, Ian had
always planned to be a doctor specializing in the treatment of cancer. Sadly, however,
even with all his company’s research they were no closer to finding a cure. But Ian was
sure that it was only a matter of time. Perhaps they couldn’t cure all cancer, but even just
ridding the world of one form that robbed lives would be amazing.
And while patenting and selling his software and surgical equipment had made Ian
wealthy, it was developing a new drug with his wife that truly made him rich. The best
thing he’d ever done, besides actually meeting his wife, was starting McCullough
Industries with her. Together they’d developed a more stable form of chemotherapy that
was more lethal to the cancer cells with very limited toxicity to healthy tissue. The trick
was all in the delivery system at the molecular level.
One of the most frustrating things about cancer treatment were the side effects the
patients suffered. Whether it was the nausea and hair loss, or the conditions that
developed years later, the treatment was often harder on the patient than the disease itself.
The meds were necessary in order to survive, but highly unpleasant to go through. And
for pediatrics, most of those treatments resulted in sterility for the patient as well. These
were the issues that Ian’s new treatment sought to combat. Treat the cancer without
killing the patient.
Ian had refused to sell his drug to any pharmaceutical company that intended to gouge
those who would depend on the medicine. Granted, Ian could have made far more money
being greedy, but he’d have lost the ability to live with himself in the process. One of the
reasons Maureen had died was his family’s lack of funds to pay for her treatment.
Maureen’s death had been the catalyst that had ultimately driven Ian’s mother to commit
suicide. Cancer didn’t just destroy the patient. It destroyed the family as well.
Ian never wanted another child to lose its life over money, especially if he had the power
to prevent it.
The men sat for several hours laughing, drinking, and talking as they munched on
appetizer platters. While Ian was nowhere near drunk, he wasn’t sure driving home was a